From this point forward I caution all readers.  Those with weak grammatical stomachs should be advised that this blog will contain graphic abuse, flagrant misuse, and calloused disregard for the proper structure of the English language. The run-on sentences, the misplaced punctuation, and spelling atrocities are real.  If you are easily disturbed by this sort of language abuse I urge you to look away now.   

 Our current editor, after a moment of clarity, has seen fit to pursue other projects.  She has left with some parting and encouraging words to any future editors of this blog. 

 “The StrangerView project represents a unique opportunity for any editor to waste precious time.  The complete lack of benefits in this position is perfect for intellectual masochists”

            -L.G.

 The StrangerView blog now has a fantastic opportunity for any underemployed editors out there to work in a thankless job.  If you enjoy working with marginal talent, sporadic content, and an writer who’s disregard for the conventions of proper communication increases every day he is in Asia this is the job for you!

 The StrangerView blog has been a stepping stone for many an obscure an underappreciated editor, and now the opportunity is open to YOU.

 Quotes from previous editors

 “I started at StrangerView with high hopes of editing meaningful stories about travel and culture.  What I learned is that any no-talent hack can start a blog”

 “Working on the StrangerView Project has been a very emotional experience, I cried a lot. It is hard to believe that one man could have so little regard for sentence structure.”

 “My time a StrangerView really helped mold me into the intellectual cripple I am today.  Had I not been exposed to such extreme sarcasm and bullshit I might have become a productive member of society.”

Yeah… I know. He hasn’t posted since the brothel incident. I could make up a great story about how he was kidnapped and sold as a white sex slave, but frankly he was too white and no one in southeast Asia would touch him even if they had a ten-foot pole.  Since people keep asking me, I’ll give you a quick update.

I left him in Hong Kong around the beginning of December. We had a killer trip… The beauty of traveling with Pete is you never know what’s in store for you. There was one night that I was sure we were getting kidnapped and I don’t even know how to write about it. What I really need to communicate this story accurately is a great pulp fiction comic book illustrator. To be honest, that was the only time I was a little nervous about my safety – so much so that I looked up at Pete and said, “If I get human trafficked, I swear to GOD I will never travel with you again.” But… there was a Chinese miracle, so here I post as Pete’s ghost writer.

I wrote a couple of stories but it doesn’t really begin to describe all the things we did and how much fun we had.

If I had to sum things up, best things were: eating mystery street food in Mongkok, hiking up to the Dragon’s Back Rice terraces, bicycling around limestone karsts in Yangshou, a sereptitious hot air balloon ride, swimming in Halong Bay, Chinese miracles trying to get to Vietnam, trying to decipher an explosion of Chinese characters, laughing at bad Asian karaoke, bumpy sleeper bus rides, getting lost in Hoi An on a moped late at night, a cooking class, Thanksgiving at Hoa’s in China Beach, finding a killer bungalow 20 feet from the beach on a southern Vietnam island, having a spectacular dinner on the beach, exploring an Phu Quoc island on a motorcycle, sticking our heads into a giant vat of pungent fish sauce, listening to bad Vietnamese guitar, eating amazing Vietnamese barbecue, drinking too much rhum and lemonade, sleeping in a tree house, riding a rollercoaster to a waterfall, shards of a peanut in the eye in a bar, snorkeling, drinking, drinking, drinking and pontificating after long days of adventuring (him, of course… not me).  Did I mention how the first English-speaking person I spoke to said to me, “OBAMA! You must be SO HAPPY!” This is the sentiment of every single person we had the pleasure of talking to.

I keep getting asked for pictures but to be honest there are so many and my ADD keeps flaring up, preventing me from organizing them. And Pete has so many and with a bum computer, it’s made it hard for him to keep the blog updated.

I was sad to leave Pete and Hong Kong; however, right after I left, his brother Chris showed up. I’m not sure I want to know all of the details, but they pretty much wrecked Thailand and Vietnam with things that involved things that included shooting guns, Thai ladyboys and teaching natives how English would rhyme with things like “go duck yourself.”

Then in January while Pete was unsupervised, he experienced a series of unfortunate events inthat included a cyclo accident, his computer totally crashed and worst, all of his camera gear, credit cards and ATM cards were stolen right out of his room ten feet away from him. If you feel sorry for Pete – think again. He’s still living a life of leisure and as he himself will tell you, we’re still the poor suckers that are stuck here with a shite economy slaving away for the man.

He spent some time in Laos and right now is back in Thailand working with monkeys trying to get his visa for India. Of course, these are all long stories really short. The good thing is that his new cards (along with some American candy and toiletries that will make him smell slightly better are on the way to him with his friend Bob – who I met briefly through email. I can’t wait to meet Bob someday because his sense of humor is decidedly more warped than mine if you can imagine that. I know… don’t even go there.

So that’s the update. If you think about it, send him an email and ask him about how to tell real girls from ladyboys.

- lisa

Mongolian Money – Mongolia currency can quickly make you feel rich. Its not uncommon to be walking around with 60,000 Tugrik in your pocket. At the current exchange rate this essentially amounts to $60, but 60 thousand of anything seesm like a lot. Mongolia currently does no use any coins, all their money is paper money. The smallest note is 10 Tugrik which is the equivalent of 1 cent in the US. This bill is give as change but otherwise not used much and often used at shrines as offering for good luck

Open sewer covers – while this is not uncommon in many 3rd world countries, I have yet to see one covered in UB. I Wonder how many people are lost each year as they are walking along, not paying attention, and just fall into one these open sewer covers never to be seen again.

Put your steering wheel wherever you like – As if the lack of any real rules of the road wasn’t enough some drivers have their steering wheels on the right, some on the left. It all depends on where your car is imported from and no regulations requiring everyone drive on the same side.

Crossing the street - Well this is quite like taking your life in your own hands. Crosswalks, stop lights, right of way… these are all just amusing distractions scattered about the city with no real purpose.

Solar eclipse – Aug 1 there was a partial solar eclipse visible form Ulanbataar, see photos 

Pushing the bus – As I ate breakfast at a café one morning in Ulanbataar I witnessed a minor traffic accident on the main street. In Mongolia if an car accident happens ( I learned this later) you are not supposed to move anything but to leave everything as is until the police arrive. Well on the main street you can understand how this will cause problems with traffic. Immediately behind the 3 cars involved in the accident was a city bus. This was one of the electric busses with a tether out of the top connected to the electrical wires running overhead. In order to get around the accident the bus driver had to climb up on the room, unhook the electrical tether and then all the men from the bus got out and pushed the bus around the cars. Efficiency is a bit of a foreign concept so the women and some other passengers stayed on the bus while the men tried to push it. The whole process took about 30 minutes, during which 2 police cars passed by, neither stopped to assist with the accident.

Here is a collection of amusing stuff. Most needs little explainaition

Mongolia boy performs a stomach trick     I was staying with a Mongolian family in their ger and when I brought out the camera the boy wanted to perform his “famous” trick. (yes the video is shot sideways)